#9

Taking my work into consideration I realize now that I tend to write my papers just how I tell a story. I jump from topic to topic or idea and try to make the whole paragraph or story blend. This is a major problem because if I go back and highlight every different idea in each paragraph I end up with at least 3 or 4 separate ideas. Starting today I need to dedicate a single paragraph to a single idea to make my paragraph more organized in the end. Another issue I think might have an effect on my reader is that my vocabulary is not up to par with other students. I try my best to think of creative words to replace some thoughts but my paper always ends up sounding informal. I don’t know how I would become better at this problem but maybe I can study vocabulary words online to help with the wording of my papers. Another problem is I use the words I and You way to much, in high school we would fail our paper if we had one “you” anywhere inside our paper. However I find it to be beneficial sometimes when I am peer reviewing someone else paper, and when they ask the question for example, “Wouldn’t you be upset as well if you had a felony charge on your record from when you were 18 years old, that still kept you for voting when you were 40 years old”? It is a question that most people would consider to be unfair, for me I see this as an opportunity to draw the reader in, and show them how absurd our justice system can be. Over all I think I need to be very careful on how I organize and word my papers, keep the questions and my opinions to a minimum and hopefully I can actually do better on my next paper, I try harder and harder each time to become a better writer but I still manage to receive a bad grade.